GET IN LINE… AND TAKE YOUR TROPHY

Those that know me, realize I’m not one for participation trophies. If I were, well, I’d be highly disappointed. Because I have been participating for about forty years and I have yet to be handed a trophy for that. Some kids grow up with shelves on their wall filled with trophies for  karate, basketball, hockey, football, softball, track, or lacrosse. They have medals for first place, second place, or third place in any number of athletic or scholastic achievements.  

I needed no wall shelves. I had no trophies to display. No medals to mount. No awards to hang. The only type of shelves I had in my room were garage-sale bookshelves.

To be honest, I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I never was one to aim for the trophy or build a plan to earn the medal. Don’t get me wrong, everyone wants to succeed.  And everyone wants people around them to see them succeed.  But a trophy or medal to me always seemed a bit empty. If  and when I did compete, when I didn’t win that trophy, it served as a  reminder that I needed to train more, to learn more, to push more, to  practice more.  It was a sign that the race just continued. Too often those that did win, well they won. The trophy went on the shelf. The medal was hung. The victory happened. And they were done. The finish line was crossed. The trophy can’t be the reward. The competition itself, the race itself, the game itself is the reward.  

If we are working for the trophy, the end of our path is going to feel empty.   

Experts  in the Positive Psychology field (yes, Happiness is now a field of  study) have uncovered research to support the fact that at times the  trophy at the end of the race doesn’t accomplish what we thought it  would. 

They’ve done facial recognition studies of gold, silver, and bronze medalists.  After hiding which medal each person won, they conduct a test as to which face is “happiest.”  Interestingly enough, the silver medalist is least happy consistently.  The bronze medalist appeared incredibly happy.  Research shows a person’s happiness isn’t dependent on the level of award they receive.  Looking  deeper, the bronze medalist is comparing themselves downward to the  alternative of not having meddled at all, and given that, they seem  pretty happy, appreciating they at least showed up.  The  silver medalist is comparing themselves to having been just one step  away from gold medal, and the majority of the time showed up the least  happy. The gold medal winners?  Well, they  are seconds away from experiencing and realizing that perhaps years, or even a lifetime of work, culminated into just a few seconds of recognition. They have achieved the ultimate in their field or endeavor. They are faced with a question that doesn’t naturally lead to happiness: “Now what?”  Yes, trophies and awards often lead to a marked ending.  An unexpected, and at times unwanted, slow down and stopping point. You crossed the finish line.

Beware of working for the trophy.  Trophies come in various shapes and sizes.  We look for them in different forms.  For some, its literal recognition -  getting to #1 and telling the world about it.  For  others the trophy is believed to be independence - to get to a place in  their career or field that they don’t need anyone else, they’ve  arrived, their ‘name is on the sign’ as it were.  For still  others its economics - the trophy is a salary, a level of earning, or  hitting an arbitrary number set that seems to indicate success in any  field.

Our generation was coddled slightly too much.  The next one even more so - receiving trophies, awards, and recognition for just showing up.  Delayed gratification has become a negative as opposed to a badge of honor.  If we aren't careful, we are headed towards building an extremely fragile human race.

With all of that said, this year was not a year of participation.  2020 is different and that needs some acknowledgment.  It was a year that required playing all in.  And if there was a year that everyone deserved a trophy, this is it.  

So, as this year wraps up, please get in line. Take your trophy. Walk across the stage. Put the medal around your neck. High five’s for everyone. Lots of gold stars and thumb’s up. Yes, everyone won this year for participating at whatever level they could.  If trophies lead to a marked ending, well this was a year deserved of a finish line. 

We all participated in 2020. Everyone has earned their participation trophy. Not sure who came in first and it doesn’t matter.  Many came across that finish line running, others were jogging, a few were  barely walking, and a couple full on rolled across it.  The story here is that we made it.

But suit up, lace up, and carb up.  The 2021 starting line is just a few days away.  It promises to be a marathon like no other.  Why?  Because every year is.  

Chris